How hot are the Tories and Labour for a piece of Lib Dem action

Since the uncertain outcome of the election last Thursday, we are faced with the befuddlement of the power makers thrashing out a deal to decide just who is in charge of us for the next five years or less.

To be honest there's been a lot of posturing and indecisiveness, where for once, Nick Clegg the Lib Dem leader, is quite crucial to the next government. Some have even gone so far as to call him the 'kingmaker' of this hung parliament. However, I have likened the whole charade to dating. What we now are seeing is basically a play for Lib Dem's affections, with the two other parties making grand gestures to see off the other.

First of all we have seen the frumpy librarian of the Lib Dem, remove her hair pins, glasses to reveal she is actually quite attractive, and none more-so than to the horny lads: Labour and Tory, who decide to vye for her attention.

At first it seemed she was drawn to Tory and his foppish charms and wealth, including many estates and famous friends. However, whilst their first date went well - let's be fair Tory showed her a good time, but didn't completely spoil her - and they agreed a second, she also secretly began seeing the college lecturer like Labour behind Tory's back. The latter always seemed like a better match for Lib Dem. They shared the same love of books, and Labour was an old romantic, but he just couldn't offer her as much as Tory could.

Both the boys were desperate to win Lib Dem, but she was unsure which to trust. To be fair both were bastards but she trusted their capacity to change. They both wanted only to please her whilst they were dating, and offered her so much.

Things then came to a climax when Labour then found out that Lib Dem had been on a second date with Tory. He wanted to know what he could do to change her mind, and even offered to change his personality and appearance for her. However, Tory was furious at the two-timing and decided to up the ante further by getting down on one knee to propose to Lib Dem, but only if she promised never to see Labour again.

Who will she choose, and ultimately end up being screwed by? Well, we're still waiting on that to be fair. Who says that Politics isn't a soap opera of its own?


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