Sunday, October 22, 2006

Through the keyhole of Dave


I have opted to give you a look into life in wales. It takes a while to get you used to, but once your here then its easy enough.

To begin Cardiff Central (Caerdydd Canolog) , the gateway into the city.
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Ah lovely (spoken like a true welshman).

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We can see here the Millenium stadium which is one of the first things you see coming into Cardiff.

Erm try to ignore this when you get here.

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This is where the magic happens. I.E it is the Uni main campus where we have lectures and such.

Now to where I live in Talybont South. This is the sort of middle class area of the Talybont complex. To describe it, it's kind of like a housing estate but with no chavs or graffiti. When I say middle class though it's only because our houses arn't as nice as the new ones in Talybont Court which cost a bit more or the outdated old houses in Talybont North (or the Talybronx as we here call it).

I would post a picture of my house. House 26, but I haven't yet taken a picture of it but I will probably add it sooner or later to this post and if I don't well tough, but anyway....

The other part of the kitchen
As the song I once accidently crafted goes 'In the Kitchen' which is Ironically where we begin our tour of the interior of House 26 first floor flat one, where I live. Its quite nice

Teh Kitchen
It has the correct Amnities
Here is where I keep my Utensils and some of my dried foods. Its spacious enough for me but hey a little more room never goes amiss.

Cupboard of doom
The other cupboard of mine. Here is where all my fancy foods are kept which don't need the fridge or freezer.
Drinky thing
We also have this drinky thing. I don't think much of these drinks are left now.
The Poptiping
And of course we have the Poptiping.
The Kitchen from yet another angle
Here is the other part of the kitchen which is where you come in etc. Incidentally who's bloody idea was it to put the fridge there!?
Dave Central from the otherside
And here is where I sitting now (naturally I am not pictured). This is room 5, my room. It's quite nice I like it, Its more spacious than it probably looks.
Dave Central
Heres the rest of the room where we can see the ensuite bathroom door, complete with the Brent quote poster.
Into the bathroom
As Hitchcock put it in a deadpan way, 'The bathroom'. I would detail what goes on here but I think its obvious.

Well thats the room tour. I hope you like and If you don't well its not like you have to live here is it! Also if you try to break it I will cut your teeth out!

Anyways, more pictures. I recently travelled home for birthday related japes. Thats right I'm 19 now which is a bit of a silly age, no milestones or anything. but I was horrified to discover there was a more sinister force lurking in Bromley and I'm not just talking about the chavs.

Bromley Scientoligists
SCIENTOLOGISTS have arrived, Thats them sitting at that table giving 'Stress tests'. They also had e-metres and books of dianetics. It was a horrifying discovery which makes me come to the conclusion, BROMLEY HAS GONE DOWNHILL!

Ladyboys! Looks like a lady but its actually a chap. This was a fun addition to the trip home.

But anyways I came back to Cardiff because well I have to really I haven't gone through all that trouble with UCAS and remarks just to not go here.

In other news there was of course the 'Westcountry gathering' in Bristol, but I took no photos of that and I think Dave documented it well enough. But I enjoyed it but I was annoyed by how nice Daves room is.

Ah well Its good enough here I spose

Sunday, October 08, 2006

News from the Valleys


I could begin this post with Welsh like saying Creso (welcome) but to be honest I'd rather distance myself from that language as much as possible for obvious reasons.
I just wanted to keep this blog going and keep everyone updated on the goings on here in Cardiff as quite a few things have happened.

As you may expect lectures have started but its's all been very interesting so far. Its been quite quirky too, for instance in my first lecture we ended up viewing a clip of the Simpsons and an American Football game, albeit only so the lecturer could demonstrate his point. Things got weirder by the end of the week when in Cultural Critism I was asked to culturally consider a giant box of cornflakes. Yes indeed, lectures have been anything but dull.

Other happenings; I've been out a few times this week, One notable occasion was where I went to see a stage hypnotist. Now I have never before in my life seen a live hypnotism and have regarded it with a mixture of sceptism and curiosity, but in its defence it did make me and others feel tired when he was putting people under. The results of which were quite funny like making people mime Madonna and making one of the blokes think his penis was talking to him.
I have also been out for drinks for a few nights this week too (as one would expect from a student) I haven't gone massively out of control, seemingly my body won't let me become really drunk no matter how much I've tried the last couple of times I've been out. However I have seeminly developed some kind of cultish fervor from the drunk people in my house recieving the nicknames 'Dangerous Dave and 'Dave the Rave' in one night. Being last night specifically.

This has proven interesting as a similar thing happened at home inspite of me not really doing anything spectacular and leads me to wonder why I am worshipped for doing very little albeit by people who are mostly drunk at the time. I suspect people are being Ironic but hey its not too invasive here so I don't really mind but I do feel this kind of attention is better spent on someone who actually tries (albeit not too hard) to do crazy things or socialise harder than I do.

Either way I've found the whole University experience quite enriching really and think the next few years look positive for now. I've also enjoyed to an extent (without being psychopathic) watching people 'dying' from the infamous 'Freshers Flu' whilst feeling quite chipper myself. I've also enjoyed hearing about other peoples random news about Uni which brings me on to my next point.

Everyone (who was going to Uni this year) Has GONE!? Thats right the clan has now been scattered to 3 of the 4 corners of the UK with Me, Dauve and Drew in the West. Dan, Nick, Steve and Lewis in the North and Matt, Rob and Jon in the Midlands. I say the corners but I suppose me and Dauve and Drew are representing the southern section too owing to our positioning. Anyway I digress but the fact is we've all been split and face our own exploits whilst here instead of sharing in our usual high jinks which is weird. Especially for the likes of me and Drew who are the only representatives at our respective universitys.

Still though we'll be back soon I suppose, me sooner than the others as I return to West Wickham this weekend, owing to my birthday on tuesday, so I can see my relatives and Chard who is left behind. I do intend to complain that the area has gone down hill as I no longer live there full time and drastically as I've been gone for only about 3 weeks.

Thats all for now.

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Wow I'm In Wales

Thats right readers I'm now at University. The University I've ended up with is the good old Cardiff University, Which I've got to after a fair deal of Wrangling.
Long story short I got 2 UMS below the needed grade of ABB and then got a remark which boosted me to that level.

Anyway I'm here now and I'm settling into my new student digs. So far I've met 7 of my 8 flatmates. Sadly all are men although we have a fair few girls across the hall and upstairs but its not the same really. Having lived in a house of all males for the past 4 years I hoped for a bit of a change but to no avail sadly.
However complaints aside my new flatmates seem nice. They are Will, Matt, Simon, Rich, Lee, Vince and Mysterious Asian Guy (Naturally None of us have met him yet but hope to soon and learn his true name).

It proved an interesting first day. After feeling very distressed at leaving my home for nearly 19 years me and my Dad took the long journey up the M4 to Wales. When I arrived I swiftly moved in my belongings and made myself at home.
Then came some shopping for some essential items at the big Tescos round the corner from my halls of residence. Later I met up with one of my friends who is also attending Cardiff for a drink and then returned to my room.

Then the evening began. I decided to head out with Will and Matt who were off out to meet some friends of Matt. At Matt's friend's flat I enjoyed some of Sam's (a friend of Matts) cooking for my evening meal. Sam and Adam (Sams flatmate) headed out to the town for general Merriment. We ended up at a Lloyds bar where a random girl took pictures of all of us for a reason which has yet to become apparent.

On the way home Sam managed to run into a gate as it was dark and it was painted black as he hurried into an alley to relieve himself. Afterwards we went back to the flat where me Matt, Sam and Adam discussed a few things, South Park being one of them.

All in all I have these thoughts about Uni so far

- Watch out for fences
- Leaving home is harder than you may think
- Talk to everyone you can
- There seems to be a heirachy depending on which accomodation you're in (i.e being in the most expensive)
and The halls are unnaturally warm

Still though the freshers fortnight has only begun so I have plenty of time to settle in

Later Dudes

Friday, June 30, 2006

Do Childrens TV presenters make sexual innuendo on purpose or am I just sick minded?

Well exams are now finished thankfully so I now have a rediculous amount of freetime. Although yesterday involved going to Thorpe Park, I'm going to follow a different theme.

As you can see from the title I'm going to explore the age old question of do childrens presenters/programmes include sexual innuendo on purpose.

From a young age we were all exposed to childrens shows like Postman Pat and such. We also had to deal with the tiresome antics of the presenters between programmes. Anyway this is what brought me to this question. The other day when I had woken up early for an exam I happened across Cbeebies (a programme for very young children for those of you who don't know)

cbeebies 2

These are the kind of fools we can find on this show. Anyways while watching this the presenters were pretending to be a train. The woman preceeded the man in an up the arse kind of way and held two heldlamps in an unsubltle way over her chest. This got me thinking. Did they just do this fomation out of instinctiveness or plan on this as they know children don't have the mental process to realise the relevance of this.

This took me back to an episode of Rainbow from the 1980s thats been circulating the internet for a while.

Zippy George etc

That's right we all remember their hilarious antics. Anyway this episode in question was made as a joke of sorts where many innuendos were thrown in on purpose, i.e "Geoffry yesterday we played with our balls didn't we". You get the idea.

Its hard to say for certain as I have no way of knowing if what I saw the other day was a deliberate attempt to take advantage of childrens innocence. I have no insight into the world of these 20 somethings who for some reason act like retards for the gratification of young children. Though you would have to assume that judging by their age and that parents watch this with children and need to be entertained in some way it is quite possible.

However I also think that this just confirms that I have a sick mind which looks out for innuendo. Ah well such is life being an male.

Another original Dave post on its way soon.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

The end of an era

So ladies and gentlemen I'd like to thank you for coming here in the first place considering I haven't posted for many moons.


But yes folks your high frilled host is making a comeback of sorts.

A lot has gone on recently and its going to take me some time to fill in all the gaps. But I'll list a couple of key events:

-I went out to vote for the first time which proved interesting

-I bought a car

Its pretty awesome and has remote central locking. (HAH IN YOUR FACE JON)

I'll start by rounding up the most obvious of happenings, naturally things have been winding down (or up depending on your personal perception) at school as the dreaded exams draw closer. As a matter of fact I had one the other day which was went ok I feel. Still though thats one down four to go.

The first event in this spiral of denoument was the sixth form prom or ball or whatever you want to call it as long as it isn't Homecoming. WE DON'T HAVE THAT HERE AND WE DON'T WANT TO EITHER!

The night was fun and of course, as I would find with any night out, preparation needed to be done.

I think the final result of which was worth the effort.

Then I made my way, with the help of my ever helpful yet annoying father. When I got there I was horrified to see that a beer costed £3!!!!!!!!! Daylight bloody robbery.

I was pleased however to see I was not alone but there were a few of me playas there

Dan was there too and quite exicitable about the whole affair

Rob and half of Jon was also there

As too was Chris our guest of honour.

Tom was there too but was nowhere to be seen for most of the night, on account of Poppy being there too. Ahem!

Lewis and Helen then turned up as the party properly got started

The first part of the night involved just standing around a bit, prattling on about the usual drival. This was however until more people arrived and the alcohol began to take effect.

At this point the night becomes partially sketchy althought there were some key highlights:

1. Miss Scotland and other teachers doing that weird boat thing.
2. Nick and Matt in a wardrobe
3. Me having a drunken chat with Malysko, Saville and Glover
4. COLEGE! (An egyptian worker there who tried to throw me and rob out at the end as we went to the room Matt and Chris had rented for the night at the hotel.
5. Me losing and then finding my phone (not really a highligh true but it was something that happened)
6. Alex Haggart in a kilt
7. Kyrill in a bowler hat
8. Teachers being drunk and that
9. Us forming a circle whilst dancing and trapping Rachel in it
10. Getting a pint off Hughesie
Much merriment was had throughout the night

Although a certain vegetarian tried to dampen the fun.

Me and Rob went to Matt and Nicks room (after the Colege incident obviously) and found the place was a hive of crazy activity

I don't think anyone doesn't realise what Matt is doing here

I left shortly after and went to wait for the cab I booked. I was annoyed when it arrived 25 minutes late but I got away with paying less for the journey than I should have and the driver and me had a nice chat about how politics screws the middle classes over.

This being done means I can now move onto the next big events and more recent goings on.

Although I'll take a small intermission first. This picture shows us taking advantage of a sleepy Nick.

Moving on to last Friday:

This was the famous leavers breakfast which was our last formal school event (aside from exam stuff). I took this oppertunity to drive to school for the first and only time (once again probably aside from exams). It went ok, although the traffic at the end of my road was irritating.

Then we arrived at the breakfast. I quickly found the others who were seated at one of the many ubertables. We were also joined by the now infamous Richard Hann. Obviously no one could honestly say piss off, never mind. Then the show (well I say show) began

Breakfast, as had been promised, was served. The bacon rolls were quite tasty I thought.

Ah Lewis ruined the picture for Dave it would seem

Something Drew took considerable offense to.

To sum up the whole event; a majority of it was basically pictures of common room people and such. Basically the sort of people who take 4000 pictures of themselves and their jackanapes. Some other people got picture time but not as much. Everyone who joined in year 7 got shown though as they replayed the reel of photos taken 7 years ago. Much fun was had especially when Io came up which everyone responded to loudly.

Then Glover spoke of how Luke Robertson was a Zinusian and gave out numerous silly awards and then Northcott gave a short speech which gave the usual sort of ambitious encouragement we know him for.

So that was it after 14 years of formal education and 7 years at Langley it had come to an end.



So we gathered as a complete group for one of the last times for a while. (well aside from Rob Tom and Nick)

After shaking a few teachers hands me Matt and Dan headed back to the Davemobile

Some joker decided to park a similar car next to mine albeit this other one was older.

After an almost perfect return trip (I stalled at one point) I chilled at home until the time came to leave to see X Men the Last Stand.

What now follows is a review of the film:

X Men three follows on from the two successful and highly entertaining previous films on the Marvel Mutant heros led by Professor X (Patrick Stewart). Both had been previously directed by Brian Singer with great skill although this time round the role was filled by Brett Ratner as Singer is currently working on Superman returns.

The film starts off establishing the origins of Jean Gray (complete with Professor X's working legs) and the popular thus-far unmentioned character Angel. Then we are brought up to speed with the films dilemma. Basically a cure has been found which removes the powers of mutants and makes them 'human' once again. This is of course met with mixed responces by the mutant community. Especially polarised by Professor X (A Pacifist) and Magneto (Ian McKellen) who is more of a mutant extremist. As if that weren't enough Jean who died (supposedly) at the end of the last film appears alive again although a bit more deranged and with a tendancy to disintergrate those who cross her.

The film of course promised lots of flashy special effects, as one would expect from a comic book superhero film. This was its biggest draw. However possibly because of this it means we are given lots of new mutants who bring very little to the story but have cool powers which are used at least once.

This pathetic attempt at a plot arc is opitomised by the Angel subplot. Poor Ben Foster probably got no more than a paragraph of dialogue in the whole film and his character only appears maybe 2 or 3 times at all and even then he doesn't do much at all.
The same could be said of Nightcrawler in the last film however he did at least play an important part to the storys progression.
The film is full of plot holes like this. The worst being the Rogue-Iceman relationship. Which is shown to be struggling due to Rogue's inability to touch someone without killing them in the process.
To make matters worse there are some key character deaths and the whole thing seems to be another daft indignity to another. The whole thing flows like the putting together of an 1000 piece puzzel only to find that there are several important pieces missing and the picture on the box is highly misleading. The whole thing to modify one rediculous line is it's a bad story shielding itself in a cocoon of cool special effects.

That was not my time best spent. Later came the Railway followed by the Pickhurst with some others.

Yesterday was Chris's birthday outing. First came Pizza express where Rowan and Chris's antics almost got the police called. Then came an awkward journey home trying to keep chris from pissing of chavs and destroying gardens.

Finally we got to Toms where we could do that stuff without worrying about people watching.

A lot of random stuff went on there. Chris Stripped to his waist. Rowan and Chris threw coke everywhere.

Cake was flung in all directions.

It was one crazy night

Well that about encompasses all the important stuff from the last month. A lot has gone on and its not possible to cover all of it. Still at least more recent issues got a mention. Still isn't it funny I pull the same face in most of my pictures.


Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Filler to gap about 3 months

I decided to have a crack at the music quiz:

How does the world see you?
Having a blast - Greenday
Ah yes everyone loves PARTY DAVE it would seem

Will I have a happy life?
You're the reason I'm leaving - Franz Ferdinand
Looks like I will but at the expense of someone else

What do my friends really think of me?
Old School Hollywood - SOAD
Eh? I'm not nearly as superficial as Hollywood and I don't like baseball. Cool song though

Do people secretly lust after me?
Cant Buy Me Love - Beatles
That could be yes and no: Yes = I dont need to buy it because I have it or I dont need to be bought or No = I Cannot be bought?

How can I make myself happy?
Killing In the Name of - Rage Against the Machine
HAHA Now thats what I'm talking about!

What should I do with my life?
Kielbasa - Tenacious D
Hmm so i should think about becoming either a butcher or some sex maniac either ways good i spose

Will I ever have children?
Muscle Museum (live) - Muse
Muscular and living ones it would seem. YARR THE SEED OF DAVE IS STRONG!

What is some good advice for me?
Agitated (live) - Muse
Well thats crap advice I dont care who says it!

How will I be remembered?
Apocalypse Please - Muse
The Bringer of the end? Nice!

What is my signature song?
What If? - Coldplay
Full of ideas me

What do I think my current theme song is?
Trashed and Scattered - Avenged Sevenfold
Thats pretty cool. Although I'm not sure if it fits perfectly

What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
Keine Lust - Rammstein
Well thats not fair...... THEME SONG WHAT THE FUCK!?

What song will play at my funeral?
Low - Coldplay
Well true I spose considering I'll be six feet under

What type of men/women do I like?
Benzin - Rammstein
Well I do like explosive personalities

What is my day going to be like?
Hitchin' a ride - Greenday
Well I am going to London tommorow which will be kind of like hitchin'

UPDATE: Passed me driving test YESH
Haven't found a car NESH
Done some cool stuff which I canne Remember now

Sunday, January 15, 2006


Wrath:Very High

Take the Seven Deadly Sins Quiz

This doesnt look too good does it.

Also I should hasten to mention that I am writing this post on the eve of a very annoying week in which I have two quite tough exams on the same day and furthermore a driving test. To put simply my anxiety levels have hit a critical mass.

Still some good has happened recently:
I now have five out of six Uni confirmations from: Staffordshire, Cardiff, Lincoln, Winchester and Kingston. To be honest though non of them will prove difficult to get into except maybe Cardiff who actually are asking for decent grades (in this case ABB). Then again I wont really be able to assess how tough this will be until I get the January results but if all goes well I might have an easy may exam period Hopefully.

Anyway boring school stuff aside the last few weeks have consisted of a mixture of school, parties and christmas so a lot has gone on.

Everyone seems to be getting Ill! Matt, Rob, Jon, my brother, Dave etc I havent been afflicted yet HOW LONG HAVE I GOT LEFT BEFORE I TOO AM STRUCK DOWN!!!! (thats the anxiety coming through there)

I'll have to post again after this stressful time is over and I'm not contunually on edge.

Peace out Playas