Is the world crazy or am I?

You are tearing me apart conventional movie expectations! The Room, written, directed and starring Tommy Wiseau is a bit of an enigma. Is it an earnest attempt to make a decent movie ruined by serendipitously hilarious incompetence? Is it a winking self-conscious parody of the film making art? For that matter who or what is Tommy Wiseau and what planet is he from (a question asked in the film itself)? It’s a little hard to put one’s finger on. Despite the contrived and repetitive plot, terrible acting and poorly realized characters; The Room has become a cult hit with bad-good movie fans spawning lively midnight screenings and even a fairly faithful flash tribute game . Screenings of the film have been compared to those of the Rocky Horror Picture Show - albeit with less tongue-in-cheek humour and dressing up – given the energy and anarchic experience that you get when you see The Room on the big screen. I was lucky enough to visit one such screening in London's Leicester Squ...

I'm just going to say this: May the Force have mercy on all our souls. The sad fact is this is the second time I've accidentally predicted a new film (which I didn't think would ACTUALLY be made) which has then subsequently been produced . First Yogi Bear and now this....

David Cameron is known for his political hyperbole and love of the soundbite but his comment today that UK film needs to be more mainstream had me worried. The big chief himself is turning his eye towards an industry he has little to no understanding of and also one that I happen to like. Worse still here he was making misguided and poorly thought out generalisations about it. It is hardly a secret that it is notoriously hard to tell what film productions will turn a profit. Many Hollywood films make spectacular losses despite the mainstream appeal. I’m far from the only one to be riled by the PM’s comments, veteran indy film-maker Ken Loach has vociferously argued against the idea and the twittersphere has exploded with suggestions of Cameron themed film names as a result. Let’s make no mistake - the Conservative government has had it in for the arts since they got their hands on the country. Jeremy Hunt the culture secretary has been hacking away at the BBC for the past ye...

There are a lot of sequels coming out at the moment. This year alone we’ve seen a third Transformers movie, another Chipmunks flick and a further Mission Impossible outing. There’s also a second, Independence Day in the works as well as further Terminator and Die Hard films too. It’s clear to see unnecessary sequels to well established film franchises are the vogue at the moment. However, it’s hard to say who asked for them? Whilst it could be argued that this is a further symptom of Hollywood’s creative bankruptcy, what else could we expect to see coming up? Here are a few predictions with accompanying synopsis: Turner and Hooch 2 A long overdue second part to the much loved 80s buddy movie. Tom Hanks reprises his role as compulsive police detective Scott Turner and is joined by Hooch’s now fully grown puppy, Hooch 2. Turner is enjoying married life when he and Hooch are called to investigate a sinister animal testing experiment ring. In a bungled raid Hooch is turned into...

Tron, when it arrived on the scene in 1982 was a groundbreaking picture. Whilst it didn’t perform particularly well at the box office, it was the first step on the road to CGI in cinemas, which for better or for worse, is now highly common place in the world of cinema. Tron was indeed influential and now in 2010 the long awaited sequel has finally arrived. Directed by Joseph Kosinski And starring Garrett Hedlund and Jeff Bridges, Tron Legacy picks up on the story twenty years on and delivers a visually stunning and entertaining next gen style reimagining of what proceeded before. The plot is rather by the numbers and follows an establishment, action, development, action, finale set-up, action, finale kind of structure; in short there’s quite an emphasis on action. Despite being relatively standard action movie fare as far as a plot is concerned – especially considering the narrative will normally take a back seat in a film like this, usually to the detriment of the film as a whole...

Gamble and Hoitz are two NYPD desk cops living in the shadows of New York’s finest crime fighters Danson and Highsmith (Dwane Johnson and Samuel L Jackson respectively). Gamble is a forensic accountant who revels in paperwork and has no interest in fighting crime on the streets, and after being pranked by his co-workers is left with only a wooden gun as a weapon. Hoitz on the other hand is a streetwise and hot headed detective stuck with Gamble as a partner; presumably as punishment for firing his gun in the line of duty unnecessarily and shooting a famous NY Yankees player during a crucial game. When Danson and Highsmith die (due to a bizarre lack of judgement on their part) Hoitz and Gamble get the opportunity to step up and fight some real crime. This ends up with the mismatched duo becoming embroiled in a murky corporate conspiracy, of the type that would bring Vince Cable to tears. Generally I judge a comedy film on the frequency of laughs (it’s not an exact science but it work...

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World on first impressions looks like a bombardment of pop culture, video games references and slacker humour. On many levels it is, but underneath that confusing coat is a decent bit of cinema, and probably one of Edgar Wright’s best films to date. Based on the graphic novels of Scott Pilgrim comes this modern tale of romance with a twist, as the titular Scott must win the heart of the love interest, Ramona Flowers, by defeating her seven evil exes; each with their own super abilities. For younger members of the audience, Scott Pilgrim will be a treat as it feels like an adult film that’s swallowed an over-sized kid (ok I agree that’s not the most visually appealing metaphor). The over the top and stylistic battle scenes as good as confirm this fact, as every punch thrown is exaggerated the nth degree. In this way there is little rooting in reality apart from that these films are set in a real world location, but for the rest of it you are seeing the world ...

Blasting onto our screens, in a wave of 80s movie nostalgia, comes the action ensemble to end all action ensembles. I am of course talking about The Expendables, the film that has brought together the likes of Stallone, Statham, Li, Lundgren, Rourke, Willis and Schwarzenegger; frankly it’s hard not to get excited by that combination. So for all that promise was the film the dumb, loud, explosive, action fest that we had been praying for? Well the answer is yes, and then some. The plot is not the film’s strongest point, but then this is an action film, where the plot is nearly always secondary. The only problem is the film sometimes tries to have it both ways and maybe indulges in more of a story than is necessary. Some parts of exposition could easily have been dropped for longer action sequences, much in the same way as Snakes on a Plane did to great effect. However, this problem does not completely ruin the film, and also allows us some laughably cheesy character development scenes...

Due to the persuasion of some close friends (they promised beer and pizza, so how could I refuse) I found myself sitting to down to watch Human Centipede (First Sequence), the high concept gore-horror from Dutch director Tom Six (is he perhaps related to Sporticus 10 ?). Now this for me was a bit of a leap into the unknown, as I knew how disgusting the premise was and had quickly dismissed the movie as a gore-for-the-sake-of-it kind of film. Nevertheless, I sat down to watch and endure it. Well, all I can say is it delivers what it promises, i.e. a human centipede - the answer to a question no one really asked – but offers little in the way of plot and believable characters, or crucially much in the way of gore. The one thing I thought that Human Centipede was marketing to its audience, wasn’t even really there; much of the horror is implied rather than visceral. Sure, the psychology behind the plot is rather disturbing, as is the thought of the ordeal of being stitched arse-to-face ...

As I commented some weeks ago. Yogi Bear was yet to be unrecognisably mangled from its 2D cartoon form, into a 3D live action film by the hacks of Hollywood. Then I discovered this: Dan Aykroyd and Justin Timberlake? Seriously? I couldnt think of a worse pairing, aside from maybe Russell Brand and Ian McKellen (and that's as the leads in ANY film, live action or no). Also in the case of the latter, does the presence of J.T. mean that Boo Boo is going to sing? I wouldn't put it past the producers to fit that in too.  Whilst I am pleased that I accurately predicted Hollywood might do something as misguided as a Yogi Bear live action film (note: I wasn't aware it had been approved as early as 2008, but then it wasn't common knowledge!), I really didn't want to be proven right!

I found myself wondering recently why there has been such a fad for real life adaptations of cartoon series. The Flintstones, Dragonball, Garfield and the Chipmunks - they’ve all been done before; not to mention there are real-life remakes of The Smurfs and Avatar: The Last Airbender also in the pipeline. The one thing most of these remakes hold in common is that they are disappointing, if not mind bendingly awful. They only seem to exist as an answer to a vague “what if this cartoon character was real” thought occasionally pondered upon by people, and picked up by a film exec sensing a profit making answer. Unfortunately that never ever translates to a film with substance although It’s a fair question to ask though. We all wonder what it would be like if the Simpson or Family guy were real, hence the increasing number of adverts I see on YouTube offering just that possibility – although most of these look like they were created from the nightmare case files of patients in the psychi...

When I first heard that the Prince of Persia franchise was being adapted for the big screen, I have to say I was curious. I fondly remembered the old pixelated 1989 classic that had filled many hours and led to some quite frustrated outbursts. So I was naturally interested in seeing whether the movie would tap into this nostalgia. Well the short answer is no. Of course being a modern film - with backing from Disney and Jerry Bruckheimer no less – it’s a big swashbuckling adventure piece, much in the same vein as Pirate of the Caribbean or Aladdin. You get the same big action scenes and some flashy camera work, but less in the way of interesting plot. The story follows Destan (Jake Gyllenhaal), an orphan who was adopted by the King of Persia after showing courage in capital city’s market place. Years later Destan, who is now a Prince, leads an attack to a city that is believed to be producing weapons. However, evil is afoot as the King is murdered and Destan is blamed. As a result...

There is an uneasy feeling in the air. Something awful this way comes. The first signs of the coming apocalypse are drawing near. I am of course talking about the nearing release of every-man’s nightmare: Sex and the City 2. Or as I like to think of it: Carrie and her squawking bum-chums Strike Back. That’s right! The most apocalyptic movie event of the year is soon to touch down at a ground zero near you, and, as you can imagine, I will be hiding away in my concrete bunker until the storm has passed. Now having never seen either film I could be accused of judging the franchise too harshly, so let me just clear the air here. Firstly, I thought the series was watchable at times. Hell, I even found myself laughing at some of the jokes. The movies on the other hand look like pure torture for heterosexuals possessing a Y chromosome, and maybe the odd homosexual female. I’ve even heard fans of the series telling me the film is rubbish, so there is no good reason for me to see it. Second...

High expectations rested on the shoulders of Jon Favereau and his team for this second outing in the Iron Man franchise. The first Iron Man movie was a box office and critical smash; anticipation for a second film was sky high. So it is good to see that Iron Man 2 does not suffer from disappointing second sequel syndrome. Most pleasing is the fact the familiar faces of Robert Downey Jr, Paul Bettany (voicing JARVIS, the computer) and Gwyneth Paltrow, are joined by several new ones, including: Sam Rockwell, Mickey Rourke, Don Cheadle (replacing the unavailable Terrence Howard in the role of Lt Col James Rhodes), and Scarlett Johansson. So there is very much the feeling that the gangs all (or at least mostly) here, and a few extra friends have been brought along for good measure. The film picks up almost exactly where the first left off, with Tony Stark (Downey Jr) announcing to the world that he is Iron Man, and since then has, in his own words: "privatized world peace."...

It’s the end of 2009 and what a year it has been. On a personal level I finished university, put one foot into the real world and planned a trip round to the Far East and Australia, which is now scarcely 18 days away. Chances are this will be my last real post before I leave and dedicate this blog to documenting my travels, so I decided to do a review of Avatar, A) as it is very much hyped at this point in time, B) I watched it the other day so it felt like a relevant topic. I felt some trepidation before watching this film, as I am always very wary of films with a lot of hype behind them and also that this was touted to be the film that would make 3D big. I have to admit I’m no real lover of 3D films. All the films I’ve seen in 3D have left me questioning its point, unless the director purposely exploited the medium by repeatedly sticking objects in the face of the viewer. This was the reason I didn’t see Up in 3D as I felt it was good enough in 2D, but anyway I’m getting away from th...

I went to see the Invention of Lying, the most recent vehicle for Ricky Gervais’s movie career playing fictitious versions of himself. Having seen his last offering, Ghost Town, I was a little worried that this film would be similarly promising, but ultimately lacking in consistency when it came to laughs. So like Ghost Town, The Invention of Lying is a high concept film which features an alternate universe where people are unable to say anything that isn’t 100 per cent true. So naturally there are numerous scenes, where we are led to titter at someone unflinchingly telling a waiter that the restaurant's food was terrible, or in other scenes where people bluntly and unflinchingly say that they hate their co-workers. It's a bit like a reality TV talent show really. That’s where Mark Bellingham (Gervais) comes in, as the tubby loser (I’m not being harsh, this fact is repeatedly shoved down the audiences throat by many of the characters), who after being fired from his job, and ...

Now I am quite a fan of action films. Sure they are purile and mindless things to watch, but god they are entertaining. Maybe it’s being a man or something, but a movie with lots of explosions; stupid puns and men who can’t act for shit, but can still forge an acting career thanks to the former two things, despite being as wooden as a petrified pine tree, but then who cares as that kind of adds to the entertainment. Anyway, I digress. The reason I’m suddenly gushing about my love of action theatre, is because the culmination of every action movie generic convention seems to be amalgamating into a massive, perpetually exploding, testosterone filled lump of pure muscle, which will be called The Expendables , and is out next year. This film has the action casts of action casts, including: Sly Stallone, Bruce Willis, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren and Mickey Rourke… oh and ARNOLD SCHWARZNEGGAR. Seriously, this film will be Actiongeddon, and may raise the bar of the ludicrous actio...

I was lucky enough last week, to be invited to London to see a new independent film called Moon, directed by Duncan Jones – the man formally known as Zowie Bowie – and starring Sam Rockwell. The film centres on the life of Sam Bell, who is on a three year contract as the solitary operator/caretaker of the Sarang Moon mining base, and to compound his loneliness a malfunctioning satellite has limited his contact with earth to infrequent pre-recorded messages. His only companion is Gerty (voiced by Kevin Spacey) an advanced computer, who assists Sam in his day to day activates; as well as keeping him from going mad with loneliness. However, one day Sam has an accident, and this begins the unravelling of the sinister truth behind the life of the isolated moon base operator. I have to say I found the plot for this film absolutely fascinating, and it challenges it’s audience to really question what the hell is going on. Sometimes this is a bit jarring, and the film guards it’s secrets adequa...

I had the rare honour yesterday of attending a preview screening to an upcoming film, in which the director was also present. The film in question was The Age of Stupid , a docudrama about climate change. The films approach is quite unconventional, as it partly set in the speculative (based on current scientific theory) dystopian future of 2055, where the earth has suffered run away climate change, and partly in the present era. This is all weaved together by Pete Postlethwaite (Brassed Off, Romeo and Juliet, The Usual Suspects) who plays ‘the archivist’, a man who trawls through news, and film footage of the past to try and demonstrate how we knowingly destroyed ourselves and our planet. The present day footage all centres upon current disasters, changes in the planet’s usual patterns and some of the human rights injustices committed in the name of the oil industry. There are six people all interlinked by the archivist, and each tells their own story in different episodic chapters. Fo...

I went to the Cardiff Vue the other day to see Notorious. Ok, people could have a pop at me for my choice of film, but I thoroughly enjoyed it so I couldn’t care less what people think. The viewing however was marred by an infestation of chavvy little cock-ends who could not keep their mouths shut. I’d caught a glimpse of these pathetic specimens in the ticket queue, and judging from the content of the film I knew they were going to be in the same movie as me. It was just too obvious considering these little wannabe rappers (just a note that rappers actually have a fairly well defined grasp of language, something which was long abandoned by the chavs in question, who seemed to be trying out a poor Tim Westwood impression at their most coherent) seemed to be trying to live up to a flimsy image of being “gangsta” with their baseball caps, jogging gear (it goes without sayin they look like they’ve been living in those clothes for weeks now, do rappers actually dress like they’re wearing p...